Yeah, 10 hours yesterday /
I am happy though / (happier than most) /
Satisfied, even / I mean, the rush is never as strong as the first time it hit / but at least something is guaranteed / it’s the internet /
there always *has* to be something out there / something else to know / something new I haven’t heard of before /
i know i’m hooked / but you have to understand / we all are
tapping, liking, scrolling,
disliking,
saving,
favoriting,
quitting and coming back. /
it’s the media age / trapped in this cycle /
why? what do you mean *why*? / why do we orbit the sun? /
what if i miss something? /
what if im not always available /
what if they dont like me /
(what if they start seeing me the way i see myself?)
and then /
what if i try to leave and never find this feeling again / this satiation again / a cousin to satisfaction, who got all the worst family genes / processing no more than 60 seconds of information /
(why would i leave? how would i survive in the real world anyways?)
i mean what if /
what if i go /
and they dont notice im gone /
what if im not connected / what if the end of the world is finally coming and i dont hear about it / what if someone dies and im not the first to know about it /
what if i could make a difference / what if i log off and nothing is any different /
can i just keep scrolling / waiting 2 find the 1 video to make me laugh 2day / keep losing myself in this pocket square / the size of my world / ? /
keep waiting for a buzz / for my connection / waiting for some1 to notice my absence / waiting to get back online / ? /
because what if i disconnect and never find what ive been searching for / hoping for /
what if no one ever searches my name when im gone /
what if all the noises stop and there is nothing to refresh /
what if all the noises stop and i have to deal with my thoughts /
what if there are no thoughts /
what if /
i am completely alone
and there is silence /
? /
Photography and writing by Hazel J. Hall.
Previously published by Valiant Scribe.
Hazel J. Hall 
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