If the Sun Will Ever Come

Content warning: mentions of past depressive/suicidal thoughts

I know she’s thinking
I’ll probably die at fourteen
as it consumes her often

I’ll have no fifteenth birthday
she tells herself
I will never see sixteen
she murmurs
seventeen is a lifetime not made for me
she decides

I know that she’s thinking
I’ll probably die at fourteen
because we are one
she is all the same body and flesh as I

she is the person I was
before I survived

If I had to
I would not ask to live it again
but sometimes I wish
I could go back in time
and tell her
that the darkness goes away
and that the sun will come

Somedays I wish
I could go back in time
and tell her
I lived

I know she didn’t mean to live past fourteen
but I’m older now
and life is not so bad

Somedays I wish
I could go back in time
and tell her
just one thing
because I think she might smile
if only she knew
that there are no longer nights
when I wonder
if the sun will ever come


Poem and photography by Hazel J. Hall
Follow my blog for more nature photos and poems alongside life-themed works!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: